If only "The Green Hornet" were an action movie. If only it were a comedy. If only the 3D wasn't activated just to squeeze more $ from duped movie-goers who thought this was a fun flick.
If only the Movie Slut had skipped this one.
But then, she is the Movie Slut and therefore had to ferret out a nugget of worthiness in this worthless dud.
That nugget is neither Seth Rogen, as the green one, or his trusty sidekick, Jay Chou, or Cameron Diaz as the requisite comely secretary, who — wonder of wonders — actually has a brain.(Even her wardrobe is a snooze in this film.)
No, the only reason to see this stingless hornet is Christoph Waltz as the evil one. He may be the most emotionally needy and amusing villain in the history of villainry.
Thanks to Waltz, this humdrum hornet earns one lipstick out of five.